Tuesday, May 02, 2006

This is a post I found a few months back on http://sidin.blogspot.com and I thought it was hilarious, read on :-

"The Travails of Single South Indian men of conservative upbringing" or "Why we don't get any..."

Yet another action packed weekend in Mumbai, full of fun, frolic and introspection. I have learnt many things. For example having money when none of your friends have any is as good as not having any. And after spending much time in movie theatres, cafes and restaurants I have gathered many insights into the endless monotony that is the love life of south Indian men. What I have unearthed is most disheartening. Disheartening because comprehension of these truths will not change our status anytime soon. However there is also cause for joy. We never stood a chance anyway. What loads the dice against virile, gallant, well educated, good looking, sincere mallus and tams? (Kandus were once among us, but Bangalore has changed all that.)Our futures are shot to hell as soon as our parents bestow upon us names that are anything but alluring. I cannot imagine a more foolproof way of making sure the child remains single till classified advertisements or that maternal uncle in San Francisco thinks otherwise. Name him "Parthasarathy Venkatachalapthy" and his inherent capability to combat celibacy is obliterated before he could even talk. He will grow to be known as Partha. Before he knows, his smart, seductively named northy classmates start calling him Paratha. No woman in their right minds will go anyway near poor Parthasarathy. His investment banking job doesn't help either. His employer loves him though. He has no personal life you see. By this time the Sanjay Singhs and Bobby Khans from his class have small businesses of their own and spend 60% of their lives in discos and pubs. The remaining 40% is spent coochicooing with leather and denim clad muses in their penthouse flats on Nepean Sea Road. Business is safely in the hands of the Mallu manager. After all with a name like Blossom Babykutty he cant use his 30000 salary anywhere. Blossom gave up on society when in school they automatically enrolled him for Cookery Classes. Along with all the girls. you can read the rest over here.

You can read the rest here: http://sidin.blogspot.com/2004/05/travails-of-single-south-indian-men-of.html


At 12:30 PM, Blogger beertap said...

Nice article..

Now let me not be very nice...

If the blacks can take over the american culture to the extent that every young white, brown and yellow wannabe wants to emulate black "people's" lingo, music, fashion and most importantly their mannerisms, so can the "southie"

If you read what i wrote above carefully (obviously all you remember is the "southie" term I used) here are some tips for the "Parathas" that'll make southie and northie indian people (who certainly dont spend 60% time in pubs n discos!!) more shagadelic

- prioritise beers, babes n bikinis outside work - fuck whisky n water!!!!
- every heard of hairstyle and exercise? - stop kanjing on a fuckin haircut!
- names are almost irrelevant (as the bangaloreans prove it - to be honest I know cooler mangaloreans (like this blog's admin - again coolness is relative)

Essentially human nature is to like anything that looks, smells, sounds good. Name does not have much to do with it - probably more in the cases of matrimonials!

Watch Russell Peters , he's the only comedian that I've seen screw all races equally well!

Intelligence is important but as we indian already know it seems to be only show in the field of IT...we can revolutionise the world's beer industry with our 1 billion people!

So f*** your article it's not all that great after all and issues above are real though not exhaustive!

Learn to switch between Tupac and Tirupathi.


At 8:40 AM, Blogger Passing Observer said...

dude, you think im cool! :-)!

At 4:08 PM, Blogger beertap said...

Dude, don't get excited..that was helping my argument :-)

At 4:51 PM, Blogger John said...

man, i loved that piece... didn't understand every single reference, but it was hilarious. btw, south indians should know that all the stereotypes, etc. about them are meaningless in North America.

At 4:56 AM, Blogger Passing Observer said...

Hey John,

I'm glad you liked it, you are right though, some of the references definitely would be confusing for a non - indian, things like tams(Tamils), kandus(from Karantaka, state where im from, also where Bangalore is located) and mallus(from Kerala) etc.

At 9:55 AM, Blogger beertap said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 10:07 AM, Blogger beertap said...


If the piece you are referring to is my comment then here are the
Southie: south indian
Northie: north indian (not commonly used)
Parathas: indian bread, an uncommon nickname for north indians
Tirupathi: a very holy Hindu temple in southern India (should be more respectful with the reference but I'm sure God believes in the freedom of speech!;)
kanjing: slang for being stingy



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